Desperate times call for desperate measures. ;)

I AM TIRED!

WHOOP!

Last 3 days of school, though. My first year of college is almost officially over. Which means, those last three days would be for the final exams. Let's face it. College is fuckin' hard. Sure, there's more freedom for your actions. You get to be so much more independent. But it's still school. Unless you're some nerd who loves going to school, you would also think that school can be a real burden and a huge pain in the ass. Anyway, my friends, Rigo and Kim, needed all the help they can get to pass their courses for this semester. Not gonna lie, I needed it too, not just for my grades, but for life in general. So, two-three days ago, we decided to seek the help of Saint Jude Thaddeus, the patron saint for desperate cases and lost causes.

Saint Jude Thaddeus, the patron saint of desperate cases and lost causes.

Our little trip was like a Dora the Explorer episode. Only Rigo knew his way around wherever we were. If he left Kim and I anywhere, we'll probably get lost. Anyway, so, around 1PM, we met at the University of Santo Tomas' Quadricentennial Square. We were supposed to leave right away, but it started raining cats and dogs. We waited 'til the rain stopped, and then started off towards St. Jude. Exiting the Espana gate of the university, we crossed the street through the overpass, and rode a tricycle to San Beda College on the other side. Can't believe that tricycle ride cost us 120 Pesos. It wasn't a really long distance. But then, who am I to complain? Rigo shouldered the 100 pesos, and Kim paid the remaining 20. Hehe. Anywho, we walked inside the Malacanang (kind of like, the Philippines' White House. Serves as home to the president.) compound, and straight to the church. Before we left campus, we were worrying about if whether or not there was gonna be a mass on that hour. Lucky for us, we were just in time for the novena mass. It wasn't the conventional Eucharistic celebration, but close enough. Haha. We found it quite funny that we saw people from other colleges/programs/courses from our university, hearing mass or doing their novena at the exact same place.

I guess we weren't the hopeless and desperate ones. =))

One thing that struck us the most was how hot it was inside the church! Dude! We were sweating bullets! Kim and I even had to take our blazers (yeah, it's part of our uniform as business students) off. It still wasn't enough, though. We had our pad papers, notebooks, and even my USTv VIP invite out just to fan ourselves. It was pure torture, honestly. We just hope that all that stress was worth it.

After the mass, we retreated to a nearby McDonald's just to cool off before heading back to our university. Am I so shallow for thinking that us ordering different flavors of sundaes is funny? Yeah? Well, I'm weird like that. Not even gonna deny it. Kim announced first that she was gonna get a Strawberry sundae. Then Rigo started whining that he was supposed to choose that. The only options left were the Hot Fudge sundae, and the Hot Caramel sundae. I never liked Caramel, so right after Rigo's whining, I called dibs on Hot Fudge. He settled for Caramel. HAHA. We're weird. Not even gonna deny it. After finishing our sundaes, we headed back to UST. Kim and I. Rigo just walked us to where we can get a ride back, 'cause he said that that place was closer to his house and he didn't want to go through the hassle of going back to school, and going the same way to get home.

So there's that. When we got back, Kim and I parted ways, and headed home. As I was making my own way home, I realized how much I missed those two and how much I'm gonna miss them when I leave. Although Kim's my classmate, even now in college, I never get to spend much time with her. We've been busy with our schoolwork, and even when we're not, we've got different sets of friends that we hang out with. Rigo is a different story. He has a different program. Kim and I are in Business, Rigo is in Pharmacy. We've got fucked up schedules and all that shit. What I'm gonna miss most about him is the good company he provides. You'll never get bored with him. Jeez. This post is making me emotional. I haven't even started talking about Van. Anyway, those three people would probably be the ones I'm gonna miss most. *sighs heavily* They're my favorite people, I guess. ;)

I've said too much. Sorry. Haha. It's just that spending time with those two made me realize how much I missed them and how much I'm gonna miss them...

I'm not gonna cry.

I swear.

Before I do...

I'm out!

- KPats ♥
xx

P.S. this post was originally supposed to be published yesterday (03/14/13) I started on this yesterday, but I was really tired and I fell asleep. So, just pretend I posted this yesterday. HAHAHA. Boo!

Psychoanalysis...

Hello there!

Remember my previous blog post? The one about "My ideal guy." There was this part when I said "I think I'm actually scared of love. I'm scared of commitment. I'm scared of trusting someone who could possibly break that trust. I'm scared to get hurt." Of course, with my bad luck, that fear became an example in my Psychology class. We were discussing Psychoanalysis, then my professor told us about an incident he encountered with his high school best friend.

Here goes...

So, during high school, my professor's best friend (let's call him Mr. X) had a pattern. When he comes close to being in a serious relationship, he chickens out and runs away. Much like me. You have no idea how many guy friends I've lost because of me always running away from them and avoiding them when they start hinting on having a romantic relationship with me. So, like my professor said, his friend has always been like that and he was so sure that Mr. X was gonna end up as an old bachelor. One day after many years, Mr. X called my professor, and told him he was getting married and all that. La da da da. Anyway, so yep. My professor was shocked to know that Mr. X actually reached the stage of actually getting married. Of course, there's a "but."

A week or two before the actual wedding, Mr. X's fiancee called my professor up, saying that Mr. X called off the wedding. Oh, shit! Right? Yeah, he did. After going through all that shit of being in a serious relationship, proposing, arranging the wedding, he called off the fucking wedding. Jeez! Anyway, some time later, Mr. X called my professor up, asking for help. He knew that my professor was into Philosophy and Psychology and all that. My professor arranged a meeting with him, and they tried to figure out why Mr. X was like that. Basing it from one of Sigmund Freud's studies, a fear like that has a root-cause coming from our childhood or early adolescence. Maybe Mr. X saw something that traumatized him from having a relationship with the opposite sex. Something that may have put him off of having a relationship. Mr. X kept giving my professor other reasons why, but after much persuasion from my professor, he admitted to something. He said that when he was a kid, he saw his mom cheating on his dad with their neighbor. That made him lose trust in the opposite sex. That was the reason he was put off from being in a relationship. He's scared that his partner would do the same to him.

Seriously! During the discussion, I felt like I was the one being psychoanalyzed.

Why didn't I want to be in a relationship?

Go figure!

- KPats ♥
xx

What a girl wants...

So, just this morning, I was walking from St. Raymund's building to the Main building in my University, when I overheard these two girls talking about their type of guy. That shit got me thinking. What is my ideal guy? 

I never tried figuring it out. I mean, what's the point? I'm not even looking for anyone at the moment. With all the stress I'm dealing with, I really don't think I'd need one as well. Just seeing my friends stress about their relationships is putting me off of having one myself. Plus, to be honest, I think I'm actually scared of love. I'm scared of commitment. I'm scared of trusting someone who could possibly break that trust. I'm scared to get hurt. Sure, I've put up my walls, and I'm not that stupid to get myself hurt in the first place. When you're in love, you end up putting your walls down and giving it your all. I don't think I could do that yet. I don't want to feel like I'm tied to something. I'm a free spirit. Sure, I guess it would be nice to have someone, but then it's all too complicated. I don't knoooooow. Gaaaahhhhh. I'm going way out of topic, I'm supposed to be thinking about what kind of guy I like...

Here goes...

1. Living in the Philippines, I was kind of "forced" to communicate in Filipino or Tagalog or whatever you wanna call it, but to be honest, I'm really uncomfortable with that language. I prefer communicating in English. Whether verbal or written. It doesn't matter. I totally prefer that. So, one of the things that attracts me to a guy is his fluency in talking in English, and it's also a huge turn on when a guy actually knows the difference between there/their/they're, his/he's, too/to, and where/were/we're. I'm serious. That's the first thing I want in a guy.
2. Second, I want someone who's straight up with his thoughts and emotions. I've seen enough relationships go down the drain because one or both of them keep hiding what they truly feel. They keep waiting for it to build up then they lash out, and POOF! They break up in the end. Dude, I thought relationships are supposed to be about trust and love and honesty?! What the hell happened?! What the hell are you guys doing?! See my point? I don't get people sometimes. *sighs heavily* And it's a huge thing when a guy shows what he truly feels. Whether it be anger, happiness, sadness, jealousy, WHATEVER! 'Cause personally, I think a guy's being serious with a relationship when he invests his emotions in it and actually shows vulnerability. But then, that's just my opinion. I'm irrelevant, remember?
3. I realized I keep crushing on guys who are just "chill" compared to the pesky, clingy, badgering ones. I get irritated easily with that. When they keep pestering you about something. When they keep clinging on to you, that you don't even have time to actually miss them. Ugh! Those people are totally frustrating. I want a guy who would give me my "me" time, some personal space and time. I don't know. Yeah. Whatever.
4. Another thing for me is when in public, they're so bad-ass and all that, but when it's just you two together, he's the sweetest person you'll ever meet. I'm not saying I want a two-faced person, but- ugh! I'm so not good at explaining shit, so I'm just hoping you got what I meant. I seriously don't know how to explain this one. I guess I'm the only person who would understand what I actually meant with this, which probably doesn't really matter 'cause I'm the only one reading this.
5. Anyway, next up, I just want a guy you could be comfortable with. Someone who could be your best friend, at the same time. Someone you could lean on when times get rough. Let's face it, there are actually some relationships where the two parties can't treat each other as best friends, and they always end up lying to the other person about something. I really don't think I'd want that. Lying to my boyfriend or something. I want someone to finally see through the fake smile I put on, and just call me out on it. It gets tiring, you know? Pretending you're alright and your friends buy the pretense and actually think you're alright. I'm not making any sense, am I? Oh well, doesn't matter.
6. I want someone who would treat me equally, and not be sexist. I don't like feeling so helpless. I'm not fragile, nor am I disabled. Sure, it's sweet and all when the guy does things for you, like open doors, carry your stuff, and whatever. That's not how I roll, dude. I don't like the "I'm the guy, I should be doing that." speech. I'm perfectly capable of doing shit on my own. I've been doing it before, and I'm definitely okay with doing it now. Get what I mean? Unless I actually end up disabled, that's definitely a different story.

That's all I could think of for now. I'll probably add more when realization hits or whatever. We'll see...

So, that's for the attitude. I've got another list for physical attributes. It's not really important, but these are my personal preferences...

1. I've always had a thing for pretty eyes. I don't know. I just do. Green ones are my favorite. I didn't notice it until I've listed down my celebrity crushes and realized that most, if not all, of them had beautiful green eyes.
2. Brown hair. Just like the thing with the green eyes, I also realized that my crushes had brown hair. Not black, not blonde, not red. Brown. Don't ask why. I have no freaking answer to that.
3. Strong jawlines! AAAAHHHHHH! That shit makes me go weak at the knees! Oh gosh!
4. Stubble or light facial hair. I don't know, but I find it really hot.
5. Clean hands and feet. Don't ask. I don't know why, either. It's just like, guys seem really neat.
6. Someone taller than I am. I've always found it a tad bit awkward when I see couples where the girl is taller than the guy. Definitely wouldn't want that to happen to me. I'm 5'5" or 1.65 m. I wouldn't want, like, 7-footers, though. I think the tallest I'll go for is 6'2". Don't ask why that particular height.

That's it, I guess. Ha. I seem so picky, don't I? Well, fuck off. HAHAHAHA. These are my preferences, remember? This is my rant blog, remember? Go away! Loljk.

Ohhhhhh!!!!!!! Another thing! Accents! Dude! I love accents! Here are my favorites:

• BRITISH! Oh gosh! Who doesn't love their accent? Definitely swoon worthy! The Brit accent is actually one of my weaknesses! Oh, I could just listen to a Brit talking ALL DAY! I'm not even exaggerating. I really could! Add up an ultra husky voice, like Harry Styles', and we're good to go. ;)
• AUSTRALIAN! Need I explain?
• SOUTH AFRICAN! Weird, right? But you probably haven't heard Dean Geyer talking! Go listen to them first before you start complaining how weird I am to like this accent. But then, his accent is a bit of a mix of South African and Australian. YOLO.
• FRENCH! Have you ever heard a French dude speaking in English? They could be saying "Would you like some coffee?" and it could still sound so damn romantic! Sorry. HAHA.

To be honest, I didn't expect this post to get this long, but YOLO. :)

Oh well, I'm out!

- KPats ♥

xx

MYX forum: "SOCIAL MEDIA: The good and the bad."

Wow. No posts for a while. Got really busy with school. 

Anyway, last Monday (March 4, 2013), I went to a forum held at the auditorium of my University's research center. It was sponsored by MYX, which is kind of like the local MTV here in the Philippines. The topic was about Social Media or Social Networking. Like, for the panelists, what do they consider "okay" to post about, when should you hold back, how should you deal with comments and criticisms. It was super fun! And I loved the guest panelists! So... Here's a quick run through of that day's events...

Since it was a Monday, my classes were until 12 noon. The forum doesn't start until 1PM. So, after class, I went for a really quick lunch in one of the restaurants in the university's carpark, then went straight to the TARC (Thomas Aquinas Research Center) auditorium. Around 12:30-12:45, three of my classmates (Marie, Carla, and Shaira) arrived at the auditorium, and took their seats beside me. Then one of the event's organizers came to us and offered us to play in the game sponsored by Smart (one of the telecommunication networks in the Philippines.) At first, I was totally against joining the game. I don't have enough 'balls' to do that kind of thing. Yeah, I guess I should live my life a little, but whatever. Going back, let's just say I had no say when it came to the game. No matter how opposed I was to it, with my luck, I ended up going first. Which, to be honest, was completely humiliating 'cause I had no idea what to do on stage. And damn it, the event's host is a huge celebrity crush of mine, Chino Lui Pio. I was literally shaking on stage and my hands were as cold as a corpse's. Oh! Another thing about the game, IT WAS TOTALLY SCRIPTED. We were given the questions beforehand, and we were even fed the answers. When the game started and when the cameras started rolling, we had to pretend we (there was ten of us who were picked out for the game) were actually volunteering. Anyway, I answered my question, got my prize (which was composed of a 2GB USB, a notepad, and a pen), got off stage, and went back to my seat. All the while, shaking and freezing to death.

So, those are the event's hosts (L-R) VJ Chino,
VJ K.A. and then that's the paperbag containing
my prizes from the game.

(L-R) Raimund Marasigan, Sam YG,
Happee Sy, and Champ Lui Pio

Around fifteen minutes after the end of the game, the main forum started. There were four guest panelists. Raimund Marasigan (member of some of the greatest Filipino bands, like Eraserheads, Sandwich, Pedicab, Cambio, and Project 1), Sam YG (a radio DJ for one of the best radio shows, Boys' Night Out of station 89.9), Happee Sy (a concert producer and singer), and Champ Lui Pio (singer and now producer). The guest panelists were given situations about the social network, and asked about how they would react to those. They gave great advices for social network users, and gave entertaining yet plausible answers for each question thrown at them. Then there was an open forum where a select few students were allowed to ask the panelists some questions. Sam YG was a huge hit among the students! He always is. He's just so witty that he could come up with great, humorous, yet serious responses to random questions thrown at him. So, anyway, that's that. The forum went smoothly, and it was really fun. After the whole thing, us students were allowed to take pictures with the panelists and hosts. My classmates and I were able to. Even got a video of Sam YG giving our section some words of encouragement for our finals (which is gonna be from March 14-19.) I had a picture with the host VJ Chino, and three out of the four panelists (Champ, Happee, and Sam.) From the start, all I wanted was a picture with Raimund Marasigan, 'cause, dude! He's one heck of a legend, when it comes to music. But, of course, with my luck, after the forum, he disappeared into thin air. Since we're talking about social media/networks, and all, and being the tweeter that I am, I tweeted about it. Lucky me, I got this in return:

The reply from Mr. Raimund Marasigan totally made up for the picture! It was good enough for me!
I feel really special about this too, 'cause I was the only one from the University who he replied to in Twitter! :">

So, when we went out the building where the forum was held, I slipped down the stairs and ended up with a twisted/sprained ankle. Stupid, right? I can be such a klutz sometimes. I was limping for three days because of that! It was hard to sit down, stand up, walk, run, go up and down the stairs. Luckier me, my bedroom is in the third floor of our house, and my classroom is in the third floor of the Commerce/AB building in my university.

Yes! That day had been both lucky and unlucky. Just a good combo. Perfectly balanced, unlike me who was limping. =))

Anyway, this blog post has been pending since March 5, and I only got to finish it today (March 10, 2013.) Been really busy. Sorry 'bout that.

Anyhoo...

Toodles!

- KPats ♥
xx

Frustrations...

Damn it. Just damn it. Remember when I said earlier in my first post that it's frustrating to be a writer? Every little thing you do, every thing you see, every daydream you have gives you a new idea for a story. A couple of hours ago, I was having a talk with my parents about my trip to the USA, and I came up with a whole new plot line for a new story! RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DISCUSSION! Ugggghhhhh. Currently feeling the frustration now. Less than five minutes ago, I was scrolling through tumblr, I came up with a new plot for another new story. OH SHIT! Now! Just now! As I write this blog post, my mind is working on another story line, which I would really need to jot down on my notebook before I forget. Why? Out of all the talents I could have had, why did god have to give me this one? I seriously can't take all this frustration. Dear April 3, please come faster!!! I need to get on that plane and start on the release of such frustrations. Uggggghhhhhh.

Sorry. I really just needed to vent that out. Haha.

Anyway, it's 11:45PM where I'm from, and I definitely need to get some sleep before part two of school's hell week comes. With the next three sleepless weeks in school ahead of me, I'd need all the sleep I can get now. *sighs*

I'm out!

xoxo

-KPats ♥

P.S. I kept having to remind myself that today's just Saturday. It feels very Sunday to me today. Don't ask. I wouldn't have an answer for that.

P.P.S. Look! It's a picture of MY (yes, I'm staking my irrelevant claims on him) Lucas! :"> Definitely gonna have sweet dreams tonight. 

Yeah, baby! Work it! :">

Hahahaha. =)) Anyway, he has some pictures where he looks like Ian freakin' Somerhalder.

But personally, I prefer my Lucas.

I'm a big "Stelena" fan, too. So, sorry Damon.

Woohoo! Paul Wesley all the waaaaaaaaaaaaay! <3

Oops. I've said too much.

I'm out.

For real this time. =))

xx

Yep. I just did.

JUST A REMINDER:

WOOHOO! FIRST BLOG ENTRY!

So, I've been meaning to make a blog since forever. Oh, you know, for rants, for venting out things, for giving out unimportant opinions, for speaking out my random thoughts. I've never been the diary-keeping kind of girl. The longest I think I lasted on that was four days. Yeah. I know. I'm sorry. 

In a month, I'll be leaving for the USA, so I thought it would be appropriate to start this really irrelevant blog to document my American adventures. Speaking of leaving for the USA, I'm a little bittersweet about that. I'm excited, honestly. It's been what? 6 or 7 years since I was there. I wasn't able to fully appreciate Disneyland or Universal Studios or Las Vegas back then. I mean, dude, I was 11 years old. Hopefully I get to have more fun this time. I'll be staying much, much longer this time compared to the last. That is the downside of my trip. I'm sad about leaving friends and family behind. I'll miss them tons! Especially Van, Kim, Rigo, Nicole, Issah, and Andrea. 

That's just naming a few. There are the other people in my group of friends, my college friends, and random university friends.

I've been craving for this trip for far too long. I need a break from my usual routines in life. It would be nice to have time for myself. Time where I don't have to worry about anything. Time where I wouldn't have to care about anything. Time away from the drama that my life entails. Time to get my writing done, most importantly! All that. I think this is also a time to figure out what I want to do with my life. I'm a lost girl. Sorry 'bout that.

Going back to the topic about my writing, yeah, I've got seven or eight short (well, not really short, but you get the idea) stories hanging. All unfinished, and all in a tangled mess of ideas. After finishing those, I've still got tons of story ideas to work on. That's one of the most frustrating things when you're a writer. You get bombarded with ideas ALL THE TIME, but you never find time in your busy life to work on them.

Jeez. I'm a mess of irrelevant thoughts, aren't I? Yeah. Definitely unorganized thoughts. Really random, too. Anyway, I've still got tons of stuff to do today. I'll have to leave you with this great saying:

;)

Toodles.

- KPats ♥
xx