Psychoanalysis...

Hello there!

Remember my previous blog post? The one about "My ideal guy." There was this part when I said "I think I'm actually scared of love. I'm scared of commitment. I'm scared of trusting someone who could possibly break that trust. I'm scared to get hurt." Of course, with my bad luck, that fear became an example in my Psychology class. We were discussing Psychoanalysis, then my professor told us about an incident he encountered with his high school best friend.

Here goes...

So, during high school, my professor's best friend (let's call him Mr. X) had a pattern. When he comes close to being in a serious relationship, he chickens out and runs away. Much like me. You have no idea how many guy friends I've lost because of me always running away from them and avoiding them when they start hinting on having a romantic relationship with me. So, like my professor said, his friend has always been like that and he was so sure that Mr. X was gonna end up as an old bachelor. One day after many years, Mr. X called my professor, and told him he was getting married and all that. La da da da. Anyway, so yep. My professor was shocked to know that Mr. X actually reached the stage of actually getting married. Of course, there's a "but."

A week or two before the actual wedding, Mr. X's fiancee called my professor up, saying that Mr. X called off the wedding. Oh, shit! Right? Yeah, he did. After going through all that shit of being in a serious relationship, proposing, arranging the wedding, he called off the fucking wedding. Jeez! Anyway, some time later, Mr. X called my professor up, asking for help. He knew that my professor was into Philosophy and Psychology and all that. My professor arranged a meeting with him, and they tried to figure out why Mr. X was like that. Basing it from one of Sigmund Freud's studies, a fear like that has a root-cause coming from our childhood or early adolescence. Maybe Mr. X saw something that traumatized him from having a relationship with the opposite sex. Something that may have put him off of having a relationship. Mr. X kept giving my professor other reasons why, but after much persuasion from my professor, he admitted to something. He said that when he was a kid, he saw his mom cheating on his dad with their neighbor. That made him lose trust in the opposite sex. That was the reason he was put off from being in a relationship. He's scared that his partner would do the same to him.

Seriously! During the discussion, I felt like I was the one being psychoanalyzed.

Why didn't I want to be in a relationship?

Go figure!

- KPats ♥
xx